Public Washrooms

I had the very, very unpleasant experience of visiting a Mac’s in Calgary very recently.
There was a very urgent need on my part to use a washroom, and words cannot describe the
happiness I felt when I saw the lit Mac’s sign with open door at midnight, when no other options
were available. Happily I entered the premesis, and inquired of the location of sweet, precious relief.What I got was a deadpan corporate quote “Mac’s has no public restrooms”
Thinking it a joke, I vocalized the very urgent, desperate nature of the situation. a.k.a.
“IT’S AN EMERGENCY!”

The unsympathetic soulless automaton behind the counter merely repeated the now unfunny line
“no public restrooms”

Now… I have one of two conclusions I can draw.

1) Mac’s is staffed by well-meaning, but slightly misunderstood robots that have no need
to use the washroom on a regular basis as we humans do.

2) Mac’s is staffed by humans who very much know the importance of regular urination, but
in what could universally be understood as a “dick move” do not extend the decency to
allow fellow humans quick, easy remedy for their suffering.

Alas, I do not think Mac’s would fall into category 2, as that would make me guilty of presuming
massive arsehole on your part. Thus, congrats on developing fully autonomous humanoid
robot employees. I applaud your dedication to science and cutting edge research. Please forward
the enclosed link to your robot overlord so that it may assimilate this important knowledge
concerning human anatomy.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Urination

Yours quite Urgently
Josh

P.S. I would quickly remedy this problem. It appears the humans are beginning to get desperate.
the top youtube entry for “Mac’s store” is a girl relieving herself in the store without the aid of a toilet.

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