Public Washrooms

I had the very, very unpleasant experience of visiting a Mac’s in Calgary very recently.
There was a very urgent need on my part to use a washroom, and words cannot describe the
happiness I felt when I saw the lit Mac’s sign with open door at midnight, when no other options
were available. Happily I entered the premesis, and inquired of the location of sweet, precious relief.What I got was a deadpan corporate quote “Mac’s has no public restrooms”
Thinking it a joke, I vocalized the very urgent, desperate nature of the situation. a.k.a.

The unsympathetic soulless automaton behind the counter merely repeated the now unfunny line
“no public restrooms”

Now… I have one of two conclusions I can draw.

1) Mac’s is staffed by well-meaning, but slightly misunderstood robots that have no need
to use the washroom on a regular basis as we humans do.

2) Mac’s is staffed by humans who very much know the importance of regular urination, but
in what could universally be understood as a “dick move” do not extend the decency to
allow fellow humans quick, easy remedy for their suffering.

Alas, I do not think Mac’s would fall into category 2, as that would make me guilty of presuming
massive arsehole on your part. Thus, congrats on developing fully autonomous humanoid
robot employees. I applaud your dedication to science and cutting edge research. Please forward
the enclosed link to your robot overlord so that it may assimilate this important knowledge
concerning human anatomy.

Yours quite Urgently

P.S. I would quickly remedy this problem. It appears the humans are beginning to get desperate.
the top youtube entry for “Mac’s store” is a girl relieving herself in the store without the aid of a toilet.

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